Do you find yourself in the midst of yet another transition?
This week we say goodbye to another school year and hello to summer. While there is much celebration over having survived this past school year, I have to be honest, transitions between school year and summer can be challenging, especially for those who thrive on structure and routine.
We develop rhythms and routines that help us maintain some order to our days during the school year. Then hello summer and all that routine gets tossed aside, and the calendar becomes absolute chaos. No week looks the same, and while we enjoy some chill days in there, if not careful, we can quickly fill the calendar up and make summer feel less than restorative.
I want summer to be great, and I find my anxiety levels rise as I plan for summer. I want my kids to enjoy the summer, the making of memories, and I want to be fully present in those memories. But how to balance the still need to get done, with the desire to allow summer to be, well, the summer we remember from our childhood?
If you, like me, struggle in this transition, here are a few things I am attempting to practice.
Recognize and accept the chaos – I find it helpful to set realistic expectations for what summer looks like. It will not look the same every week or even day to day. Summer is full of random activities, less structure, pool towels drying across deck railings, unmade beds, and meals at unreasonable hours. It’s part of what makes summer, summer. Recognizing the transition from school year routines into a more flexible schedule is important.
Plan but be flexible – The kids need to be active, or else they will spend all summer binge-watching Netflix or playing video games. We need a plan, but we also need to be flexible to roll with the reality of our days. It is ok to throw the plan out and chill for a day. (note to self here) Planning helps, but flexibility allows you to avoid stress when your plan is not working.
Find the calm in the chaos – As someone who thrives on routines and structure, I am my best self when there is structure and routines. Understanding means I need to create space for myself to get some tasks done, recharge my introverted battery, and find calm. While I would love to turn off the alarm and linger in bed every day, I am not my best self or the best mom when I do that. So for me, summer means continuing to set my alarm and getting up early in the morning. After a few calm hours, all to myself, I can be fully present with my kids throughout the rest of the day.
Expect Less, do more – It’s a mental trick that I play with myself, but I find it very helpful. I keep a running to-do list, but each day put only one or two items on my planner. Somedays, I am on a roll and can check off more from my master list. If I only get one item checked off in my planner, it’s a win, and if I get more done than expected it’s a really big win.
Involve the kids – When the boys were little, we would transition into summer by making a giant summer fun tub. It was full of bubbles, sidewalk chalk, pinwheels, or other fun activities to keep us busy over the summer. As they got a little older, the summer fun transitioned to pool passes and family memberships to the zoo or other fun places. Now that they are big kids, summer tends to get busy with sports, camps, and various activities they want to engage in. If we are not careful, I, as a mom, end up in the role of manager of all things instead of mom. So before we get too far into the summer, we sit down and make a plan. We have summer binders that hold all the important information and provide a space to keep memories of summer. Together we finalize the camps and activities they are participating in. We make a list of fun activities we want to do, things we will learn, what we want to read, etc. Involving the kids in creating summer routines allows them to feel ownership of their time.
It’s all about finding the calm in the chaos.
Donna Karan
Summer can be a beautiful time to slow down, recharge and reset before another school year begins. It can be a time of building strong foundations and reconnecting as a family. Finding calm in the chaos of transition between school year and summer can help elevate stress and set the tone for building beautiful summer memories together.
Resources and inspiration: We reuse our summer binders but update the content each year. Since I am currently reading Growing Slow by Jennifer Duke Lee, we went with a Growing Theme for our planning. To download a copy of our summer planning outline simply click here: Growing This Summer Binder Inserts
Yes, we are those parents that ask our kids to do academic stuff in the summer. This year we are trying the Summer Academy Workbooks for the first time, most summers we have used Summer Bridge Activities.
We are blessed with an amazing local library where we have been able to participate in wonderful free programming and summer reading activities. The boys have aged out of most activities, sadly, yet we still sign up for summer reading each year. As a reader I love encouraging reading and I also enjoy being able to create a little friendly completion as I out read them. Remember to check your local library and take advantage of community activities in your area.
As a mom of boys I am determined not to allow them to leave home ill-equipped for managing the daily tasks of life. Summers have been our time to work on learning new skills appropriate to their age. Each summer we add something new, from learning to do laundry to cooking meals from scratch, even mowing the lawn and yard work. The cool things is once they learn it, for the most part they own it. Make learning at home, fun and creative, yet with purpose.
