Taking Time For Reflection As We Transition To A New Season.

It is that time of year when we begin to put away the pool towels and the sunscreen in favor of bouquets of sharpened pencils and stacks of notebooks. While I love welcoming the arrival of Spring and then Summer in their seasons, I am most fond of a season that brings out the mass amount of school supplies. Paper and pens with stacks of fresh notebooks and endless isles and isles of school, aka office supplies, is a dream. Plus, I’m beginning to tire of the heat and look forward to pulling out the sweaters and jeans again.

Transitioning from one season to another can be challenging as our routines and rhythms change. But with every challenge comes an opportunity. Before shutting the door on the summer season and moving on to back to school and fall, let’s take a moment to reflect.

Life happens, and much of it these days we can not control. Yet we can move forward with intention. Part of being able to move forward intentionally comes from taking time to reflect on the season we leave behind. To help us do that, I have five questions for us to consider.

What are some of the unexpected blessings you have discovered in this past season?
Counting our blessings helps us decide what matters most. In this pandemic life, I have found the slower start to our mornings to be such a blessing. This summer, we have had no camps to attend, no summer sports, and working from home has meant no morning rushing around. Mornings have allowed us to linger over breakfast or coffee, sit out on the back deck or front porch. To take long walks, read, or journal a little longer than usual. There are fewer morning arguments and grumpy attitudes as we are not rushing out the door. While we will have to set alarms and move back into morning structures recognizing this blessing of the relaxed pace now allows us to be intentional about our morning routines.

What have been some of the difficulties in this past season?
Recognizing hard things can help us better process them as we move forward. Maya Angelo says, “If you don’t like something, change it. If you can’t change it, change your attitude about it.” We can’t always change the hard things, but we can improve our attitude and approach to those things. For our family, like many others, we find ourselves at home all the time together. Finding ways to give each other space and also to add variety to our weeks has been a challenge. As we transition back to school, we start school virtually, meaning that the problem won’t change too much. So this is something we can’t change, but maybe we can improve our attitude and get creative moving into this new season.

If you don’t like something, change it. If you can’t change it, change your attitude about it.

Maya Angelo

What Rhythms and Routines have been working well for you?
I love rhythms and routines, but I have also recognized that we can get stuck doing what we’ve always done even when it no longer works. What worked for us a couple no longer worked when we added kids. As our kids grow up, schedules change, and it’s essential with each season to adjust our rhymes and routines to make sure they are working for where we are at now, not where we were. As a planner, I struggled with our inability to plan in a pandemic life, and when we did, plans were always changing. So we decided that we were going to take summer planning one week at a time. I bought each of the boys’ planners, and on Sunday, we’d sit down and talk through the week ahead. Now that the boys are older involving them in planning out our week, meal planning and cooking have been working well for us. This system isn’t perfect, but the boys are learning life skills, and it’s taking pressure off me to manage everyone’s stuff. Some form of this, we will plan to continue into the next season.

What are some of the Rhythms and Routines that are not working?
As I mentioned above, we often find that rhythms and routines work for a season but don’t always work the same every season. My summer morning routines look very different from my school year routines. It’s the natural rhythm of our lives, so before moving forward into the next season, it’s good to reflect not just on what is working but also what is not working. Work-Life balance this past season has been a challenge for both my husband and myself. As a teacher, summer months mean I am not teaching, but it doesn’t mean there is no work to be done. As a writer, I am continually seeking out space to write and invest in my creative outlets. There is also housework to be done, bills to be paid, connections to be made, and continuing education. My husband has been and will continue to work from home. It’s been a challenge not to step into the “office” to finish that work. It’s always there and always needing attention. As we move forward, creating healthier work-life rhymes will be on our list.

What are you doing to tend your own Body? Mind? And Soul? Are you intentionally caring for yourself?
Self-care can be a challenge. Taking care of yourself can feel selfish, or it can be an excuse to make yourself a priority over others. It doesn’t have to be either. Self-care is not a natural or well-practiced habit for me. I am the person who forgets to eat until I get hangry or someone hands me food. I am the person who takes care of buying everyone else clothes but feels guilty buying myself something I need never mind just want. Gradually I have been changing my mindset not to be selfish but instead take care of myself so that I can care for others. I am thinking of it as the oxygen mask on the airplane.

We need to put our oxygen masks on so we can help others. We’re no good if we can’t breathe. Also, I’m learning to put things in perspective. Each month we pay for an Xbox live subscription for my kids, yet I struggle to invest in a monthly membership that helps grow me as a writer or provides support in managing my home. Yes, we have budgets, and we can’t do it all, but why am I quick to say yes to others and no to myself. Are the routines you have in place created space for you to tend your body, mind, and soul? If so, will they continue to work as you transition into this new season? Do you need to add rhythms to help you tend your body, mind, and soul?

Creating a habit of looking back as we move forward is not original to me. Among others, Maya Angelou speaks about the value of learning from the past to provide direction for the future. Emily Freeman does a fantastic job in her book and podcasts The Next Right Thing, not just walking us through the process of making decisions but reminding us to take notice as we transition between seasons. Creating a habit of reflection is more than just walking down memory lane. It’s about recognizing what is working, what is no longer working, what we have learned, how we have changed and moving forward into the next season with a purpose. Reflection does not mean we live in the past. Instead, we learn from the past, live fully present in the moment, and can be intentional about moving forward.

I have great respect for the past. If you don’t know where you’ve come from, you don’t know where you’re going. I have respect for the past, but I’m a person of the moment. I’m here, and I do my best to be completely centered at the place I’m at, then I go forward to the next place.

Maya Angelou